Thursday, May 10, 2012

My relations with bees

Honey bees, according to NBC news, are suffering from a mysterious disorder that has resulted in large population loss, on the order of 30% since 2006. NBC noted that honey bees are necessary for pollenation of crops that humans depend on for food, and cannot be replaced by other agents.

It is my belief that honey bees can identify humans by their irises because the bees have compound eyes that observe a complex logic that enables this identification of mammals on a selective basis where bees desire to take a certain ecological stand. I believe that bees identified Moses as he floated down the river as a baby, and used him to gain some control over the Egyptian domains. I believe that bees identified me when I tortured them as a child, and are responsible for my rise to unusual high position, and then for my casting into oblivion and loss of my chances to win a Ph.D. in astronomy at Yale, an M.A. in architecture at IIT, and certain Chicago opportunities, though this last loss is being contested.

These poor relations between bees and myself are most unfortunate. I was young and reckless when I committed my offense and now regret it. However, ecology seems to be working in my favor now, despite the cost that might be paid by the human species as a whole. I could tolerate downsizing of the species due to loss of crop production. If it means an end to my enduring bad luck, I'm all for it.

Having crossed that bridge, I declare that I favor 100% population loss of honey bees--extinction.